Oscar S. Cisneros


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Modern Day Proverbs
By Oscar Salomon Cisneros

I have always wanted to live up to the wisdom of Solomon whom my mother named me after. I admired the Proverbs of Solomon as a child. During my difficult teenage years, I often joked that I turned out to be more of a wise ass than a wise man. Many years have passed since those days, and now as a young man I have found that it has been both a pleasure and sometimes very painful to learn a few lessons in life.

Please accept these modern day proverbs in the light that they are offered: Humbly, from a young man who has learned a few of them the hard way -- through experience.

These proverbs are a work in progress. Check back later for more...

Proverbs On Communication

  1. In absence of communication the mind is left to speculate. Speculation is the mother of mistrust.

  2. A good communicator anticipates how their message will be received.

  3. A good listener sees what they hear in the light most favorable to the speaker.

  4. Everyone has a duty to express their grievances to the one they feel has wronged them, but no one should be blind to their own insensitivity.

  5. Harboring hurt feelings causes them to fester.

  6. Expressing a painful emotion eases its pain.

  7. Not everything one feels should be spoken.

  8. Silence can speak and so can the eyes, but nothing substitutes the enunciation of thoughts and emotions with words.

  9. Actions speak louder than words, but words speak so much more clearly.

  10. You can only communicate with people at whatever speed they are ready to communicate at.

  11. Even two people who in good faith want to communicate can err in understanding. As long as both try and have a little patience, they can achieve understanding.

  12. You can't always communicate with everyone.

  13. You can only talk about talking about things for so long.

  14. Gravitate towards those with whom understanding flows with ease and away from those with whom words cause only friction.

  15. Offering advice when another is expressing themselves is not a form of listening. Asking a question is.

  16. There are times when the burning emotions of conflict demand to be quenched by immediate communication and there are times when it is best to let passions cool before expression begins.

  17. Agree to disagree. A difference of opinion is only a difference of opinion.

  18. Speak with harsh exagerrated tones and no one will listen, but few will deny a firm and reasonable voice.

  19. When you express yourself in anger, your heart grows a callus. When you express yourself with violence, a part of your humanity dies.


Proverbs On Relationships

  1. Trust is a function both of a person's trustworthiness and one's ability to trust.

  2. Callused hearts do not feel, but forgiveness makes tough skin tender again.

  3. It is natural to feel threatened on occasion, but acting on one's insecurities can quickly cause them to come about.

  4. Learn to love yourself before you love another. Insecurity is a hole than another can never fill. Don't ask them to.

  5. Mistrust breeds mistrust. Withhold your love from another and after a while you'll find they'll withhold their love from you.

  6. Listen to your loved one when they express their grievances toward you, even if you disagree. Expressing an emotion eases its pain.

  7. Lots of times when someone is expressing how they feel they just want you to listen. The very act of expression will make them feel better. So listen.

  8. Acknowledging another's pain is the first step towards healing it.

  9. Own up to half of the blame and you'll goes more than half way toward solving the conflcit.

  10. It's hard to love a person who constantly accuses you of not loving them. Mistrust breeds mistrust.

  11. Different people have different ways of expressing their love. For some, sweet spoken words and constant caresses convey love best. For others, a more quiet appreciation implies their affection.

  12. Find a person who conveys their love in a way that you understand; make sure they love the way you say you love them too.

  13. Some days are filled with a thousand perceived slights by one's lover; only mention one or two of them. Chances are, they are being very patient and tolerant with you as well.

  14. Never go to bed angry with your partner.

  15. Don't assume a friends anger or sadness has anything to do with you. Just ask.

Proverbs On Confidence and Self Image

  1. You can tell a lot about a person by how they accept a compliment. A person who is confident with themselves is comfortable with occasional praise; the insecure will be reminded of the flaws that they constantly imagine.

  2. You only have to be attractive to the person that's right for you and the person that's right for you thinks you're really, really hot.

  3. If you design the notches on the ruler, you always measure up. Make your own ruler.

  4. The healthy animal grooms. Take care of your appearance.

  5. It's natural to assume that a cat with mottled fur is ill. Thus, it's no surprise when people assume the same about a rumbled, dishevled appearance.

  6. Take care of your appearance for yourself, as a sign of respect for yourself. Incidentally, others will notice.

  7. Thirty minutes of heart-pumping motion three times a week will really improve your demeanor.

  8. As a rule, if you think you're eyes are the color of vomit, they are probably very pretty.

  9. The next time you find yourself feeling comfortable and content, remember that feeling.

  10. Take ownership of your negative emotions. Remember what it felt like when you felt comfortable and content.

  11. Wicked barbs forms the armor of the weak, but strength lies within the souls of the meek.

  12. If you find that your friends constantly denigrate you and treat you without respect, find new friends.

  13. Don't internalize another's ugliness.




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